08/06/2017

Best Invention Of All Time? You’d Be Surprised How A Poll Of 2000 People Turned Out.

invention3    invention1   invention2   invention4

Two thousand people have been polled to find out what they thought were the ten best inventions of all time. However, a note of caution, these men and women were applicants for Love Island. DNA sequencing……not in the top ten, splitting the atom…..not in the top ten, nor were the written word, the printing press, the combustion engine, space travel, electricity, gunpowder or even flip-flops, the selfie stick and the Kardashians. Included in the list was the wheel (fair enough), the internet (tick), the fridge and light bulbs (but not electricity, duh), penicillin (okay, I guess), the plough (in the top 50 at best), armour (in a bemusing nod to the middle ages), the clock (arguable as we could tell the time with a sundial anyway). And yet we have not reached the nadir, the one invention people believe to be the best, most innovative ever, the culmination of human intelligence and ingenuity. It is, of course, the teabag…….what?……yes, a bag for containing tea leaves. Give me strength. We know that polls are always accurate so this is the truth as our group of 2000 see it. I’d round them all up and put them in prison so they can no longer be a danger to humanity, stop them procreating and roundly slap them periodically to see if we can get their brains to start working. Thomas Sullivan invented the teabag in 1908 but to put him ahead of Einstein, Hawking and many others is delusional. Science has taken us to the stars, to instant communication, to knowledge at our fingertips but they needn’t have bothered, apparently all humanity was seeking was a way out of sieving tea leaves.

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