On Your Marks…Steady At The Back There Jeremy….Get Set….Prepare Your Lies….Goooooo!
After promising not to call an election until 2020, Theresa May has called for a general election on June 8th. So, we’re starting on a lie already and no one has got a manifesto together yet. It appears no one saw this coming (although in my New Year predictions on here I guessed at a summer election), which does show our MPs, civil servants and press to be incorrigibly useless at predicting the near future. Panic has already set in in the Labour Party as up to 100 of them could be claiming jobseekers allowance on June 9th, leaving Corbyn hanging on like grim death as party leader. If you like a wager on such things bet on the Conservatives coming out of the election with between 50 and 100 majority. There will be no surprises this time…….except maybe the Lib Deads…if there are, and there are, many Labour voters who cannot bring themselves to put a cross in a box for Comrade Corbyn, they may just opt for the supercilious, anti-Brexit Tim Farron, perhaps leaving Labour on the road to complete oblivion. If the Tories win by a significant margin they will probably be in power until at least 2026 as the gap would be too large for even a resurgent Labour party under another leader to close in one election. this will be a largely uneventful election because most people already know where each of the parties stand on the main issues of the day; Brexit, NHS, education, foreign policy and what they think of the new Bake Off team (just so they appear human, you understand?) – Conservative cuts, Labour over-borrowing, UKIP on immigrants, Greens saving the Panda and Liberals clueless, while the Monster Raving Looney Party may gain seats in places where people say ‘why not?’ When the leader debates are broadcast May versus Corbyn will be the equivalent of a lion feeding from a dead zebra with Tim Farron taking the role of a hyena slobbering over the scraps and Paul Nuttall as a ringworm lodged in the lion’s gut.