06/03/2017

Giving The War On Drugs A Swerve – Durham Police To Give Out Free Heroin

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Durham Constabulary has drawn up plans to give free heroin to long-term addicts. Chief Constable Mike Barton argues that the move will save money as addicts would no longer have to steal to fund their habit. Estimated costs of administering the scheme would be £15,000 per annum – or half a police officer. Durham has an estimated 2000 heroin users depriving law abiding residents of approximately 1000 officers on the beat. One radical alternative idea would be to use those officers to take down all the drug dealers in the area and stop the problem at source. In a remarkable interview Mr Barton said, ‘police were set up to prevent crime, not to arrest people.’ ??? As the police are increasingly useless at preventing crime AND arresting criminals this is a crazy argument. There is nothing wrong with providing ‘safe’ areas and clean needles for addicts or testing kits for ecstasy users but free drugs is a step too far. Should the police do the same for cocaine, marijuana  and a myriad of other mind altering substances? Free vodka for alcoholics? A safe house full of goodies for burglars to rob? Free prostitutes for sex addicts? Former Deputy Assistant Commissioner of the London Met Brian Paddick (now Baron Paddick) experimented with this idea by instructing his officers not to arrest or charge people using or possessing marijuana in Lambeth. This led to a rise in users and dealers coming into the area causing great problems for the law-abiding residents. Due to his failed policies Paddick was rewarded with a place in the House of Lords. Makes sense.

Did Obama Order Wire Tap On Trump’s Phone?

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In a 3am tweet President Donald Trump accuses former president Obama of ordering phones at Trump Towers to be tapped. In days gone by ‘tapped’ used to mean ‘crazier than a drug dealer’s pitbull’ – a term now owned by ‘The Donald’. Evidence for the claim is sparse….non-existent – but that is how fake news works; pull out the pin, hurl, stand back and wait for the explosion. Obama has, of course, denied the allegations, to which the Trump camp responded, ‘Of course he would say that wouldn’t he?’ It is possible the FBI have been involved in ‘listening exercises’, trawling the airwaves for evidence of anti-Americanism but as Trump tends to put all his innermost thoughts on Twitter anyway, it seems unlikely they would garner much from his telephone conversations. Who would want to hear Trump and Piers Morgan or Nigel Farage discussing their mutual love of themselves? Later this week Trump will tell Twitter that Obama is now a Muslim convert and that James Corden is a dangerous Communist working for Kim Jong Un.

Let’s Kill All Gender Related Language – Snowflake Tale 1,834,633

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So, here’s the rub; radical transgender activists (RTAs) are calling for the terms breast cancer and breastfeeding to be outlawed in favour of ‘chest cancer’ and ‘chestfeeding’ to avoid discriminating against women who have become men. Holy Jesus, Lord of the Dance. The man/woman/WTF who began the call to arms, Trevor Macdonald (no, not THE Trevor Macdonald) set up a ‘chestfeeding’ blog to inform us all of his ‘journey’ towards inanity. Trevor gave birth recently and was able to ‘chestfeed’ his baby – that’s make him a woman then? Men don’t give birth, mainly due to the lack of ovaries, a womb and the presence of a penis – OMG how offensive am I being? – nor do they lactate. Trevor is very confused. I guess the midwife who delivered the baby shouldn’t be called ‘midwife’ either – that is an insult to all transgender ‘midpartnerbabydeliverypersons’, of which there are precisely…….zero. I assume Trevor still has to undergo tests for prostate cancer? Or do we have to gender neutralise this to ‘asshole’.

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